Malls and cities
Thoughts on a disappeared world
It’s the time of the year when the malls are stuffed with people trying to get their Christmas shopping done. This was more fun for me when I was younger, especially when there were more retail options for browsing books, movies, and music, but ever since the pivot towards online shopping and away from physical media, I don’t really have the same interest in visiting malls or big box stores as I used to. It’s partially due to age and a lower tolerance for these spaces, but it’s also a realization that these are memories of a world that no longer exists.
When I lived in Selkirk, Manitoba as a kid, it was always a novelty to go to the malls in Winnipeg (about 22 km south) because the one in town paled considerably in comparison; it was anchored by an IGA and a Metropolitan department store, and didn’t have much else, although it did include a combined book and stationary store, as well an independent record store. The malls in Winnipeg were much bigger, with food courts and more recognizable chain stores. My favourites were Polo Park and St. Vital Centre, and going to either was a treat even after my family moved to the city, but even a piddly little mall like Intercity had more to offer than the Selkirk Town Plaza.
As an adult, I prefer the independent stores, but when I was young it was always fun to be able to browse in HMV, Music City, MusicWorld, and Sam The Record Man, compare prices and selections. I would rifle through the different artists’ catalogues, not knowing much beyond overplayed radio singles, and not adventurous enough to stray too far away from the familiar. My tastes broadened as I got older, though, and I came to value any store with a good selection, particularly of indie and deep catalogue titles, as well as staff who knew (and loved) music. It was also nice to be able to find a decent selection of CDs or TV season sets in the cheapy bins at the big box stores; those were actually a bigger draw for me than the rest of the stores’ respective merchandise.
Music retail pretty much collapsed in the last 15 years; there’s one mall chain here in Canada, but most of the time I get my physical media from independent stores or online. I just go to the malls and the big box stores when I need things they sell, not so much because I want to.
My family left Winnipeg for New Brunswick right before my senior year of high school. I see social media posts from friends who live in that city, and I wonder about what aspects of life there I would have taken advantage of had I been of age to appreciate them. The Maritimes feels like a parallel universe to the rest of Canada (Quebec is its own thing); our population is comparatively small, a lot of tours don’t stop here, and we don’t have quite as much influx of the American chains as the rest of the country does. Going from Winnipeg, a multicultural city and transportation hub with a population of over 600,000 (at the time), to Miramichi, a city comprised of force-amalgamated towns and villages with a total population of less than 20,000 and a waning economy, was a bit jarring.
On the other hand, I met some of my favourite people after we moved, and graduating from high school in Miramichi led me out of town to attend a small liberal arts university, whereas I likely would have still lived at home had I attended either the University of Winnipeg or Manitoba. Having the physical distance from family was better for my own self-development, and let me start to figure out what I really wanted and valued.
I haven’t been back to Winnipeg since we moved east over 25 years ago. When I was younger, I used to want to go back for a visit, but with the cost of travel (as well as everything else) being what it is, I don’t see that happening soon. Both the city and myself have changed so much since then; whatever ties I had during my adolescence aren’t particularly strong, even though there are a few people I’ve kept in touch with over the years. I don’t know how it would feel to be back there.
I’ve mentioned it before, but it’s been eye-opening just how many longtime friends have been getting ADHD and autism diagnoses recently. I wonder if that’s part of the reason we’ve been drawn to each other. Neurodivergence is a part of myself that I always felt I had to keep hidden in order to be accepted or at least taken seriously, and I’m glad that I have more space to honour my authentic self.
How many people read these things I post and feel seen on some level?